I have too many closets. In my opinion most people have too many closets. Now I don’t mean I have empty closets. Actually the opposite is true; they’re overflowing with random stuff. This is an analogy of our so called “modern life”. We need more closet space for all the things that we might need someday. That chafing dish you use every third Christmas when it’s your turn to host the family dinner. Really, I have nothing against the “right tool for the job”, but is it worth the space it takes up in your life? It was only a few years ago that we were given a really nice sofa. We were thrilled because prior to this we used fold-up camping chairs as living room furniture. What a luxury! Please do not misunderstand me. I like new things. I like shiny things. And I really like technology and the opportunity it has to connect the world, more importantly people. I adore having access to people across the globe. 
All that being said, when is it ever going to be enough. I’m not against the modern world, but why when we have something that works are we driven to make it better. Obsessed to the degree that it sucks so much time and energy that we miss out on the beauty that surrounds us everyday. Beauty that can not be found in your local mall!!
I feel my background gives me a special perspective on this. Growing up the youngest of 4 children, my parents divorced when I was 5 leaving me without any memories of a family together. My dad moved away, as I entered junior high ,to start what is now a very successful business. We all make sacrifices never knowing for sure what we have given up. I remained with my mom, who worked multiple jobs just to pay the bills. As many people I know, I received little to no guidance on how to balance money and happiness. Factoring in that I ALWAYS had to learn things the hard way, there may have been more attempts than my memory will allow. This being said, I truly believe that my family always did the best they could, and I am TRULY grateful for the love and support that I did get. I know many that were not so lucky. I have often been misunderstood by those around me. This certainly laid the foundation for much self exploration and FINALLY discovery of who I truly am. It’s a wonderful thing to be comfortable in one’s beliefs, and yet have faith in the unknown.
My family includes some amazingly intelligent as well as fanatically driven individuals. This in itself is not bad, but we have lost sight of the importance of family and what we could be together if only we took the time to engage one another. Okay, how does this connect with having two many closets and too much stuff in each one. We live in a consumer driven society. Well, actually a MARKETING driven society!! We have allowed big corporations to convince us that what is in our closets is more important that who is in our family. Maybe you don’t see this in yourself, and maybe you have escaped their trap. Congratulations. Move to the head of the class. All I am saying is by taking a good look at your closets one can get a glimpse of what you see as important. Do you have 20 shirts or 200 shirts? What do you really need? You may see me as a minimalist, but I see it as keeping it simple in a world of endless complexity.
Today is a perfect day to reduce my clothes by half! Yes, I figure less clothes less laundry. Stay with me… Do you have a constant pile of clothes that never seems to get washed? I mean you keep doing laundry, but the pile seems to stay the same. Do you have clothes that you don’t really wear, but they keep ending up in the laundry basket. Of course I do have children and they like to “help” with the laundry, but I don’t think that explains it all. I’ll let you know how this works because like everything in life this is an experiment. Stuff does not make one happy, so it’s out with the stuff and in with the happy. I encourage you to search out places to recycle unwanted items. Here on Cape Cod we have “Swap Shops” at our local dumps. This is brilliant. It’s an all in one stop….need crap…need to get rid of crap….come on down it’s FREE.
I am declaring this a year to embrace all that I am. For years I have been lulled into accepting others’ reality as my own. I will stand my ground, and be an example of who, why, when, where, how and of course how much. I am giving myself permission to let go and see where it takes me. I invite you to look at your closets and create some space for what ever you value most. Space is a very powerful and magical thing to bring back into your life.
I am 34 year old, mother of two fiercely independent young boys, wife of a wonderfully supportive man and finding it increasingly hard to live in a world that makes less and less sense. We moved to Cape Cod to invest in a house that would allow us to “get out of debt” and achieve the “American dream” of having our own home. We were desperately trying to build a solid foundation for our future, so we bought into the idea of “you need to spend money to make money”. My advice regarding this is ALWAYS FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCT! You are responsible for your own decisions and YOU must live with them! When you’re young it’s easy to look to others for guidance instead of standing up for what you know is right.
That was 3 years ago and there have been many bumps and bruises along the way. Of course that’s to be expected, but I was not prepared for the endless battles over simple things. In preparation of the eventual sale of the house we had mapped out a remodeling plan, even going so far as to sign a contract between all parties involved. And even though things did not go according to contract, I am still thankful we started out that way. We have had an extremely hard time with the remodeling of this house mostly because of constant disagreements between us and my in-laws, who are also heavily invested in this house. Oh, did I fail to mention we went into this investment with FAMILY! I know better than to mix family, business and money! First we argued about the maintenance of the lawn, than the installation of a whole house fan as opposed to individual ceiling fans in each room and the list goes on and on. Each time something needed to be done, it was an 8 course meal (not literally!) of talking about who, what, when, where, how oh and of course how much. We never agreed with them and they never agreed with us, so it was always 2 against 2 without a tie breaker. With much disappointment, Chris and I finally decided to stop believing that they actually wanted to hear our opinion even though that was what was being said. Oh, and did I mention that Chris is a professional full-service carpenter and has been doing high-end remodels for almost 15 years now. Obviously, he’s still not qualified to pick out a countertop or be trusted with any sort of decision of the sort. If Chris got little recognition, I got even less. After two years of working on the landscaping without any support financially, mentally or physically, “professional” landscapers were brought in by guess who to focus on curb appeal. Oddly enough when I said that the irrigation system was not adequate the first summer, no one listened, but when the “professional” said it 6 months before the property was to be put on the market, well I’m sure you can guess where I’m going with this.
As we prepare to sell our investment, we struggle with so much more than moving boxes. When I look at the past 3 years, it’s not hard for me to look at the events from a multitude of perspectives. And even though I still think we got the short end of the stick, I also think that we were given an opportunity that I’m glad we didn’t turn down. I love were we live, and am thankful for so much. That being said, I am ready for a new direction. One that we make. One that is not based on the decisions and outcomes of our parents and their generation. It is strikingly clear to me that what worked for them, has not and will not work for us. This debt driven society must end. I want more time and less stuff. I want to find a way to be happy without all the things we are told we must own to be happy. So now we are just trying to get out of this house and accept it as a big, fat learning experience. So I guess this blog is going to be about what I have learned and where I hope it will take me. Deep Breath and I’m on my way….